Your Money Or Your Life? - It's all in the Story
Many of us feel that we can either spend our time doing what we love, enjoying our life, or we can spend it earning money and if we're lucky there will be time left over to do some of the stuff we really want to do at:
the end of the week
the end of the year
the end of our lives!
Are you constantly having to choose your money or your life?
You may have money in the bank but your work is so demanding that when you take time off you can't truly relax.
It can seem like a catch 22!
If you don't have any money, or have a debt problem, you probably have a large amount of stress which can impact your health and relationships.
If you do have money, and are good at managing it, you can use it to solve a great number of problems, often even psychological and spiritual issues.
Here's the thing though.
Having a 'Your Money or Your Life' mindset
encourages us to think we are separate from our money.
Here is an example of how our money is really just another expression of who we are and how it can show us what needs to heal and shift in our lives.
Sara grew up in a home where money was scarce. Her mother was an alcoholic and her father left when she was 9, emptying the bank account on his way out. As an adult Sara earned a low income, spent more than she earned, and then would go on very strict budgets to try and pay off debt. She was always in difficult relationships with men who had no money.
Sara's overspending helped to keep the emotional pain from her childhood at bay. She felt compelled to buy things to avoid feeling bad. In money coaching we call this 'emotional spending'.
Sara experienced extreme maternal deprivation growing up with her alcoholic mother. In her relationship with money this is played out as money acting the 'mother' role. Money is the scary being with all the power, withholding the nourishment, Sara is the helpless victim.
Each relationship Sara goes into is with the 'one true love' who will make her happy forever. She is looking for a rescuer, a father figure, the mythical prince charming.
Tell Your Money Story
Working with your money story allows you to see these patterns for yourself.
It supports you in clearing out negative self belief as well as finally gaining control of your money.
There is often grief along the way as you see just how much you have been missing and the truth of what you really deserved: peace, comfort, security and independence.
As you learn to really take care of yourself any longing for prince/princess charming, a lottery win or a fluke inheritance dissolves. These leaves space and energy for a reliable new partner or maybe a lucrative new position.
Once a healthy balance is established in the money relationship it can then continue strengthen and deepen. Planning for enjoyable events and saving for future security and freedom become part of daily life.
Coming back to the catch 22...
It is easy to point the finger at bad old Money, Society, Politics, Family etc. and blame them for the stress and scarcity in your life.
Remember you may think you are being affected by your money but actually it is your money that is being affected by you.
My job as a money coach is to hand you back the controls!
Money is just another way of how we show up in the world. It is, in fact, an amazingly accurate mirror. Ever heard that before? It is often said about those we have a close relationship with, just as we have with our money!
So a mindset shift from "Your Money Or Your Life" to realising that "Your Money IS Your Life" gives you the motivation to face your story, mine it for the gold it holds within and begin your own money journey!!
Your Money IS Your Life